Friday, December 5, 2008

Burnout...

Lately, I have been... what is the word? ... tired.  Yeah, that's it.  I think it was about the same time last year that I was feeling the burnout of my job.  So, maybe it's just an annual trend, but maybe not.  I just don't know how much longer I can do it.  Ideally I will go to the end of the year and then we can move, but who knows if the moving part will even be possible at this point.  And if it's not, then what?  Do I continue on with this job that I don't really like and never expected to be in for three years? Or do I find another job temporally until we do move?  I don't know. 

 I have been in a dilemma trying to figure out what I want to do next.  It's this waiting game, really.  Waiting on the economy, mostly.  Trying to see when exactly it will turn upwards and allow us to sell our house and move to NC as planned.  Since Andrew and I got married and bought this house, we were determined to move to NC by Summer/Fall of 2009.  Well, that time is quickly approaching and house sales in our neighborhood are at a standstill.  Not only that, but we are increasingly disappointed with the idea of taking a loss on our home in the sale.  It just doesn't seem right.  It's not fair.  It makes me want to cry and scream and kick my legs in a tantrum on the floor!  This is the first time in something like 50 years that the housing market has gone down and not up.  That's just our luck.  We're at the point though that we would really just like to make something.   Ya know?  We just don't want to have to PAY
 anything.  That would be the worst!  

Ultimately, we both are just ready for a change... in career, in location, in lifestyle.  And we hope and pray that that time comes sooner than later.  

I said in my last post that I was thankful for my house, and I am.  It's just a tough pill to swallow when you make such an investment only to possibly lose money.  Especially because we don't have anything else to help us buy our second house. That's the ultimate frustration.  If we make nothing on this house, the question remains of how much longer we would have to rent and save money for the next down payment.  Who knows.  

So, now... all we do is wait and pray.  And wonder what we will do next.  What steps will we take? What jobs will we get? Will we have another child? Will one of us go back to school?  We really don't know.  

For now, we are just taking it one day at a time and trying to keep positive attitudes.  I'm excited for Christmas!  Caroline will get it a lot more this year than last and for me that is thrilling!  We still have some decorating to do and she loves all the lights and stockings!  It's fun!  I put up the tree almost two weeks ago, but I have yet to decorate it. So, I'm going to let C help with it in the morning!  It should be fun!  She loves having a job and helping mommy!  I'll take that while I can! :-)  

Thanksgiving was lovely and it really gave me a good time to reflect on how blessed we really are!  God has provided us with so much and I am so grateful!  It was great to spend time with family and some very old and dear friends!  

Here are a few of my favorite pictures from last weekend!  

C loved playing the piano!  Good thing she's getting her very own keyboard for Christmas! 

C and her great-Granny!  So sweet!

C was THRILLED to be around a little baby.  This is her with Valerie my cousin Bo's 2 month old angel!

This is the gang at dinner before going to see Karla's show!  woo hoo!

And finally, my lovely girls Karla, Darcy and Kim came to see us in the 'noke on Saturday!  Too bad I was feeling feverish and funky thanks to strep throat!  boo!

I have the best friends and family!  And my little girl, she is seriously the most awesome child I've ever met! :-)  So Thankful!  

2 comments:

Unknown said...

My sweet Erin - God will lead you to where you are supposed to be - just keep your faith and put your trust in Him. If you pray to live in His will - you will be at just the right place in just the right time. God is so good - He has blessed our family so abundantly! Just remember to thank Him for every situation - even the days at work that aren't so great. He is blessing you and teaching you at every turn in your life!

Anonymous said...

Caroline has gotten so big! I can't wait to see you guys again. Praying that you will be able to move close very soon!!! Erika